We all know that confidence is a work need. But, like many women, I need more.

Confidence is honed, so I’m told. So I looked for a trainer and found Sheryl Goldstein, global strategy and business development director at Own the Room, a New York-based executive presence training firm. Own the Room trains individuals and groups in public speaking, presenting, and more.

Women’s “confidence coaching” workshops were offered by Goldstein and her colleagues at The Girls’ Lounge during Advertising Week in New York. She claims both junior and upper-level employees approach her seeking advice on how to improve their “executive presence” and professional confidence.

“We observe uncertainty and lack of confidence in their abilities to be taken seriously, to be heard,” she says.

Goldstein’s advice to ladies like me:

Avoid slurs

Goldstein detected my timidity right away. She stated she recognized it after I gave her a two-minute elevator speech full of “ums” and “likes” and “yeahs”.

Her advice to other women is to pour water in their coffee, soda or wine glasses for every “yes” or “uh” they say. Squeeze a taste at the end of the hour to see how much you’ve diluted it down (literally). Learn More about confidence coaching for women.

Know “the pause’s power”

Goldstein inquired about my project. I didn’t know what to say so I blurted out “do most women arrive with a problem?”

Another Goldstein tip: if you don’t know the answer right away, think about it before responding.

“The King of the Pause,” says Goldstein, is Obama.

“I haven’t given that enough thought,” he says. Let me think about it, “It’s also quite commanding.”

Wait for others to engage you — engage yourself.
I told Goldstein about how shy I was at my new job, having to force myself to speak up in meetings and socialize with coworkers at happy hour. I may be waiting for an invitation to join the chit-chat, Goldstein noted. And it won’t come.

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